Mom's Tools for Staying Sane...ish

Whether you're like me- a work at home single parent-or not, we all need a break. But how, HOW do we get a break when our kids have issues typical kids don't? Having special needs kids can often make it hard to leave them with a sitter, so what do you do?

Some of us have family members our kids are comfortable with who can take them for short periods of time to give us a few hours' break (or maybe a night). Others don't- maybe they live too far away, maybe their family cannot handle their child's needs, maybe there's no family left. And even for those who have family to help out can't always turn to them for help- if you're in meltdown mode at noon and your family members are out of town, at work, or otherwise unable to help, what do you do???

Keeping in mind that my kids are higher functioning, so what works for us may not work for you, here's some ideas from Mom's Tools for Staying Sane...ish:

1. Pop in a movie the kids will watch, hand them a snack, and lock yourself in your room for the duration. Or until someone screams. Screaming should probably be dealt with by an adult. Probably.
2. Stay up an hour or two after the kids go to bed. Watch a movie. Drink some wine. Read a book. Take a hot shower.
3. If you're not a night owl, get up an hour or so before your kids (unless your kids are like mine and get up at 3 a.m. Then, by all means...sleep as long as you can!), and drink yourself some coffee or tea, watch the morning news, whatever.
4. Speaking of time to yourself, actually use that time for YOU. No, put down the laundry. Step AWAY from the sink. Don't you DARE lay out that kid's clothes yet! Bad, Mom, bad! Sit. No, really, SIT DOWN. Good Mom. Now, drink your coffee. Yes, it's hot. It's SUPPOSED to be hot.
5. Can't trust the kids in the living room alone? Okay, guys- quiet time! Everyone to your room! Yes, your OWN room. Because I don't trust you to let your brother live in one piece in the same room, that's why! Set a timer and no one is allowed out until that timer goes off. 
6. Separate. Bedtimes. Yes, really. The King goes to bed at 6:30. Taryn goes to bed at 7:30. Kyle goes to bed at 8:30. I get individual time with each kid so they are less likely to hang on me throughout the day, AND their bedtimes are early enough that staying up for a bit after they go to bed for myself won't kill me when they inevitably get up before the sun. 

Will those ideas work for everyone? Naturally not, but it's a starting point, at least. Every parent needs time to themselves. We didn't stop being ourselves just because we became parents. I have always needed time to myself- I get way more than just a bit cranky without it. What do you do to get time to yourself?